You don’t have the shadow volume to sit next to me in the sunshine of truth.

“I’m itching for battle—with a mosquito bite. The only thing in life I’ll scratc…”

“One cup contains Starbucks coffee, and one holds diarrhea. But which is which? …”

“A blanket could be used to study the stars more thoroughly. I don’t know how ex…”

“If my name were Mark Twain, I’d write under the pseudonym “Samuel Clemens.”