You don’t need gale force winds to push you in the right direction. No, all you need is a good wife to push you around.

“Love is 3:33 am plus 360 degrees plus 365 days, minus 12:34 pm. I ought to know…”

“I am Fried Quiero Loud Babcock (not bad cock), and I am here for the ranch dres…”

“Science doesn’t listen. Science has mice growing out of its ears. Wait, I mean …”

“If I remain silent, the proper response is, “You don’t say.”