Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did?
Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty.
Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin.
Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
Mots clés humor intelligence calvin hobbes
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Hobbes: Jump! Jump! Jump! I win!
Calvin: You win? Aaugghh! You won last time! I hate it when you win! Aarrggh! Mff! Gnnk! I hate this game! I hate the whole world! Aghhh! What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn't want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you'd cheat! I knew you'd win! Oh! Oh! Aarg!
[Calvin runs in circles around Hobbes screaming "Aaaaaaaaaaaa", then falls over.]
Hobbes: Look, it's just a game.
Calvin: I know! You should see me when I lose in real life!
Mots clés humor calvin hobbes bad-sport
Hobbes: Do you think there's a God?
Calvin: Well, somebody's out to get me!
Mots clés life god calvin hobbes
I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.
Bill WattersonMots clés humor calvin hobbes hiccup
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Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him?
Bill WattersonMots clés humor reflection calvin hobbes puddle
I say, if your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.
Bill WattersonYou know what's the rage this year? ...Hats.
Bill WattersonLook! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid!
Bill WattersonMots clés humor nature comics calvin-and-hobbes kids calvin hobbes comic comic-strips
A precursor to the Social Darwinists, Hobbes argued from th premise that the primordial human condition was a war fought by each against each, so brutal and incesssant that it was impossible to develop industry or even agriculture or the arts while that condition persisted. It's this description that culmintes in his famous epithet "And the life of man, solitary, poor, brutish, and short." It was a fiction to which he brought to bear another fiction, that of the social contract by which men agree to submit to rules and a presiding authority, surrendering their right to ravage each other for the sake of their own safety. The contract was not a bond of affection or identification, bot a culture or religion binding togetehr a civilization, only a convenience. Men, in his view, as in that of many other European writers of the period, are stark, mechanical creatures, windup soldiers social only by strategy and not by nature...
Rebecca SolnitMots clés social hobbes paradise-built-in-hell
CALVIN: Hey, I got some mail! It's a Valentine card.
HOBBES: From Susie Derkins!
CALVIN: It says "Please be my Valentine."
HOBBES: You're Susie's Valentine!
CALVIN: I'm not her Valentine just because I got this in the mail, am I? Does the Post Master General know about this?
HOBBES: Calvin and Susie, sitting in a tree-ee! Kay-eye-ess-ess-eye-en-gee!
CALVIN: I don't have the KISS her, do I?! Is that what Valentines do??! Oh, gross!
HOBBES: First comes lo-ove, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!
CALVIN: This can't be happening! I need a lawyer! She can't make me be her Valentine!
HOBBES: Here she comes! Here comes Susie!
SUSIE: Hi, Calvin.
CALVIN: Get away from me! I'm not your Valentine! Take your card back! Eww! Girls! YECCHH!
SUSIE: That card wasn't for YOU, you Moron. Didn't you read the back of the envelope?
CALVIN: "Calvin, please give this to Hobbes." HOBBES?!
HOBBES: Me? Really? Hot dog! Smooch City, here I come!
Mots clés mail calvin hobbes valentine envelope calvin-and-hobbes-bill-watterson smooch susie-derkins
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