I became what I am today at the age of twelve, on a frigid overcast day in the winter of 1975. I remember the precise moment, crouching behind a crumbling mud wall, peeking into the alley near the frozen creek. That was a long time ago, but it’s wrong what they say about the past, I’ve learned, about how you can bury it. Because the past claws its way out. Looking back now, I realize I have been peeking into that deserted alley for the last twenty-six years.

Khaled Hosseini

Mots clés rape posttraumatic-stress-disorder rape-survivor raped trauma

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In order to escape accountability for his crimes, the perpetrator does everything in his power to promote forgetting. If secrecy fails, the perpetrator attacks the credibility of his victim. If he cannot silence her absolutely, he tries to make sure no one listens.

Judith Lewis Herman

Mots clés lying denial secrecy crazy credibility survivors insane hysterical rape-survivor abusers perpetrators sexual-abuse survivor abuse abuse-survivors abuser attack-on-character attacking-people backlash break-the-silence child-sexual-abuse child-sexual-abuse-survivor false-memories false-memory-myth false-memory-syndrome-campaign healing-from-abuse incest just-tell lack-of-accountability perpetrator pschological-abuse rape-culture rape-myths sexual-assault sexual-violence unstable victimized victimizing

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A while ago?” Anaxantis asked. “Yes, he raped me a while ago. Exactly nine months and two days ago. What's that? Nine months or nine minutes. It's the same. And it is in the past, you say? Then why is it still happening, every day, every time I close my eyes? Every time I hear someone behind me, and I don't know who it is? How is it that I get an almost irresistible urge to kill anyone who happens to touch me unexpectedly? Tell me, Hemarchidas, how do I forgive, let alone forget, something that is still happening, that keeps happening over and over? How? How do I do that?

Andrew Ashling

Mots clés time forgiveness rape killing kill forgiving rape-survivor raped forgive

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... in practice the standard for what constitutes rape is set not at the level of women's experience of violation but just above the level of coercion acceptable to men.

Judith Lewis Herman

Mots clés power inequality law rape crime feminist sexism dominance criminal male-thinking abuse-of-power rape-survivor raped patriarchy rape-culture sexual-assault sexual-violence coercion feminist-theory abused-women coercive-acts male-dominance male-domination rape-convictions violation

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I now think that was distanced me from Tricia and from the Rape Crisis Center was their use of generalities. I did not want to be one of a group or compared with others. It somehow blindsided my sense that I was going to survive. Tricia prepared me for failure by saying that it would be okay if I failed. She did this by showing me that the odds out there were against me. But what she told me, I didn't want to hear. In the face of dismal statistics regarding arrest, prosecution, and even full recovery for the victim, I saw no choice but to ignore the statistics. I needed what gave me hope, like being assigned a female assistant district attorney, not the news that the number of rape prosecutions in Syracuse for that calendar year had been nil.

Alice Sebold

Mots clés advocacy therapy rape-survivor

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