I solved world hunger.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Oh, ye of little faith.”

“You realize that solving world hunger would mean you’d be doing something good for a change?”

“Ah, but there’s the kicker: I destroyed my solutions.” He finally looks away from the window and gives me this cocky smirk. “Malevolence 101, Kirk.

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I’m going to kill you, you know.

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Why am I surrounded by sluts and morons?

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You have a certain charm, believe it or not. That, and you feed me.

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You know, you’re kind of a badass.”
“Please, if I had balls they’d be bigger than yours.

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I underestimated your laziness.”
“It’s pronounced intelligence, Kirk.

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she knows how to make me feel better - when she isn't making me feel like an asshole

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You're bored?" she says incredulously. "You have two hands and a penis. This shouldn't be a difficult equation.

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You are so inconvenient to my existence. That I can't even stand to look at you. I look at myself in the mirror. And you stare back. You are me and I am you. This inconvenient existence. One living, the other dying. You consume my existence. And I let you. 'Cause I love you.

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You want to carry some peace-making message to him?"
"If it'll help," she agrees.
"Okay. Tel him he's an absolute bastard-a scrawny, ugly, bald motherfucker who is going to die cold and alone. He'll know what it means.

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