I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.
Jon StewartTag: humor absurd thanksgiving
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Insomnia is my greatest inspiration.
Jon StewartI was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character.
Jon StewartTag: funny
I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.
Jon StewartIf the events of September 11, 2001, have proven anything, it's that the terrorists can attack us, but they can't take away what makes us American -- our freedom, our liberty, our civil rights. No, only Attorney General John Ashcroft can do that.
Jon StewartTag: funny civil-rights patriot-act ashcroft
Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.
Jon StewartTag: paradox religion absurd organized-religion
If America leads a blessed life, then why did God put all of our oil under people who hate us?
Jon StewartTag: absurd good-questions
By the way, when you finish the bottle of Crown Royal, you can still use the pouch to hold your broken dreams.
Jon StewartTag: humor
Yesterday, the president met with a group he calls the coalition of the willing. Or, as the rest of the world calls them, Britain and Spain
Jon StewartTag: funny
Yes, the long war on Christianity. I pray that one day we may live in an America where Christians can worship freely! In broad daylight! Openly wearing the symbols of their religion... perhaps around their necks? And maybe -- dare I dream it? -- maybe one day there can be an openly Christian President. Or, perhaps, 43 of them. Consecutively.
Jon StewartTag: humor christianity religion
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