I was raised right — I talk about people behind their backs. It's called manners.
Kathy GriffinSo yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can't help it.
Kathy GriffinTag: censorship language speech etiquette regret
Life is adventure. Travel is adventure at a different address.
Kathy GriffinTag: traveling
My mother’s father was just called “The Governor,” or “Himself.” Which, if you have sixteen kids, probably isn’t as crazy as it sounds.
Kathy GriffinTag: humor parents-and-children
When my pals in high school were starting to drink, it always looked unappealing to me. I would be at a big party and see one of the popular girls or football players completely wasted and puking and acting a fool, and think to myself, There’s nothing cool about that. I never wanted to be that out of control.
Kathy GriffinTag: addiction alcohol high-school
Of course, I’ve told Jesus to suck it, too, which earned me a certain measure of notoriety, because you have to make fun of any religion that would let you have sixteen kids and say it’s God’s will.
Kathy GriffinTag: humor children religion jesus catholicism
I honestly never once heard them fight. They yelled at us kids all the time, but never at each other. My siblings and I joke to this day about how the reason we have trouble in relationships is because we never learned how to fight from our parents.
Kathy GriffinTag: humor relationships parents-and-children
Presentation was the name of the Catholic church [my mother's family] attended, and this is what I love about the Irish: My mother became known as the second prettiest girl at Presentation parish. “Why was that okay?” I once asked her. “Oh, because everybody knew Mary Griffin was the most beautiful girl at Presentation,” she replied. My mom was happy to be on the D-list! Just like I’m not trying to be Brooke Shields, she wasn’t trying to be Mary Griffin.
Kathy GriffinTag: humor catholicism parents-and-children brooke-shields
At St. Bernardine’s the nuns never liked me. Especially Sister Mary Bitch-and-a-Half. I think that was her biblical name.
Kathy GriffinTag: humor catholicism elementary-school nuns
Mom’s a hypochondriac, too, so the best part was that every week she would get the disease that the medical shows were dramatizing. I’ll never forget, they did an episode on sickle cell anemia, which as far as I know, is almost exclusively an African-American affliction.
Kathy GriffinTag: humor parents-and-children hypochondria
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