We live in a reasonable world which tells us the incredible is impossible. But reason is about to be swept aside in the new order. I will renovate the universe in my own image!

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We live in a reasonable world which tells us the incredible is impossible.

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You’re breathing the same air as a bunch of pill-popping manic depressives, alcoholics, and schizophrenics. You’ve been drinking tea with a bunch of crazy teenage washouts. It seems I’m the only sane one here.

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Signing autographs is better than signing on!

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Being dead is a bit like…living in Bournemouth.

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Is your dad Mr. Kipling? Because you're a tart!

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Tag: bitchy-but-awesome



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Signing autographs is much better than signing on.

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Tag: humour



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Signing autographs is more exciting than signing on.

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I can hear clouds drifting across the sky! The worms beneath my feet…demand freedom from the darkness…the secret hopes of humankind…all of it trivial. I can see into other worlds…other universes…they’re calling out to me. They’ve always called to me! I never knew that until now, but now I know everything.

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Tag: darkness



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I watched Question Time on BBC1 last night and I've come to the conclusion this country needs more unemployed politicians.

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Tag: humour



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