That was the time he tried to tell her that she had to leave the valley and go to college. I believe the edited for TV version of her response was something like "Fudge you, you're not my gosh-darn alpha anymore. You don't tell me to leave the fudging pack. Now, get the fudge away from me before I ripe your--' What? It was funny at the time.
Molly HarperTo say I had some pent-up anger would be like saying Britney Spears had minor impulse-control issues.
Molly HarperIt seems kind of light for a dozen books. I think it's probably that unnatural number of Jason Statham DVDs you ordered."
He has to have filmed a nude scene at some point in his career. I don't care how many shoot-'em-up action movies I have to watch, I will find it," I said solemnly. "Oh, yes, I will find it.
Tag: humor determination
Not to be rude, but it was all pointless," I noted from across the room. Four eyes narrowed at me. "What? I said 'not to be rude'. That's like saying 'God bless them' right after you say bad things about someone. It means it doesn't count!
Molly HarperTag: humor rationalizations
I think the very word stalking implies that you're not supposed to like it. Otherwise, it would be called 'fluffy harmless observation time'.
Molly HarperWelcome to the fascinating world of the undead! Please use this guidebook as a
handy reference as you make your first steps toward eternity. Inside you will find
information on vampire nutrition, relationships, and safety. But before learning
about your future, a word about our past…
—From The Guide for the Newly Undead
The scent of growth, quiet and green, hung heavy in the air. I heard everything. I saw everything. I could count the craters on the moon. I could count every mosquito buzz past, bypassing my tender skin out of respect for a fellow bloodsucker.
Molly HarperI’ve never done this before. I didn’t go to human bars. Mudslides aside, I’m not much of a drinker. Club people are not my people. Now, book-club people—
Molly HarperI am your sire. I am to guide you through your first days as a vampire. Your first feeding is a rite of passage, a sacrament. It will not be wasted on some hormone-driven frenzy. This is why I wanted you to feed from me.”
“I will not drink it in a house, I will not drink it with a mouse. I will not drink it here or there, I will not drink it anywhere,” I wheezed, hoping I was able to communicate adequate sarcasm through the crippling belly cramps.
“Did you just quote Green Eggs and Ham?
In a werewolf pack, you cannot interfere with the mate choice of a clan fellow. You cannot intentionally harm that werewolf’s chosen mate. You are not, however, required to help that person should he find himself in a life - threatening situation.
Somehow, Zeb had managed to stumble into several such situations in the few months since he ’d been engaged to Jolene. He’d had several hunting “accidents” while visiting the McClaine farm, even though he didn’t hunt. The brakes on his car had failed while he was driving home from the farm—twice. Also, a running chainsaw mysteriously fell on him from a hayloft.
He would never get that pinkie toe back.
Tag: humor hunting vampire werewolf pinkie-toe
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