A true friend is a gift from God. Since God doesn't exist, guess what? Neither do true friends.
Scott DikkersTag: humor friendship cynicism atheism
Be sure to lie to your kids about the benevolent, all-seeing Santa Claus. It will prepare them for an adulthood of believing in God.
Scott DikkersTag: humor advice religion atheism childhood parenting kids santa
Statistically speaking, there is a 65 percent chance that the love of your life is having an affair. Be very suspicious.
Scott DikkersTag: humor love romance relationships statistics infidelity adultery suspicion
Your pet is not your friend. It is your hostage.
Scott DikkersTag: pets
If your workplace was somehow transplanted into the jungle and everyone was forced to survive at a very primitive level, it's safe to say that eventually your boss would rape you.
Scott DikkersYou have sexual tendencies that are not normal, and you should be ashamed of them.
Scott DikkersI respect your right to hold your religious beliefs, and if they help you, I think that's great. I would, however, like to inform you that you are a raving kook.
Scott DikkersTag: humor
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