Oh no he does not! He does NOT read James Freaking Patterson. Our salvation - our provider…we must be out of our minds.
I happen to find Patterson thought provoking and suspenseful.
You what? Did you just say you find James Patterson thought provoking and suspenseful? Jesus Christ open your eyes! Are you so desperate to believe that you're defending James Patterson?!
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Roads are no place for naive chickens dreaming of nirvana.
Shalom AuslanderIt couldn't be an all-bad world, could it, not with birds who warble and call? Maybe that was the secret - to find the few things that made life just a fraction better, and to focus on those. Bird warbles. Peach fuzz. Puppies barking as if they're full grown dogs. Nothing great, certainly nothing to justify the rest of it, but enough to keep you going.
Shalom AuslanderTag: life life-and-living
Stop expecting more from us than we can possibly provide, and you'll stop being so disappointed.
Shalom Auslander...the greatest source of misery in the world, the greatest cause of anguish and hatred and sadness and death, was neither disease nor race nor religion. It was hope.
Shalom AuslanderTag: sadnes
So desperate was Kugel for things to turn out for the best, proclaimed Professor Jove, that he couldn't stop worrying about the worst. Hope, said Professor Jove, was Solomon Kugel's greatest failing.
Shalom AuslanderWe are rational creatures, Professor Jove explained; hope is irrational. We thus set ourselves up for one dispiriting fall after the next. Anger and depression are not diseases or dysfunctions or anomalies; they are perfectly rational responses to the myriad avoidable disappointments that begin in a thoroughly irrational hope.
Shalom AuslanderI moved a pillow aside... preferring the joyful company of the delusional to the miserable company of the sane.
Shalom AuslanderIch verbrachte meine ersten Monate im Heiligen Land meiner Stammväter damit, mich zu betrinken und eine Grasquellen zu suchen. Die Israelis verkauften Gras, hieß es, die Araber Haschisch; ich sah keinerlei Hoffnung für den Nahen Osten, wenn sie sich nicht einmal einigen konnten, wovon sie high werden wollten. Die Studenten der Hebräischen Universität standen eher auf Pilze, und wenn man entsprechend drauf war, gab es immer noch Haifa, ein zentrales Verteilungszentrum des internationalen Heroinhandels. Und ich hatte immer nur von Milch und Honig geträumt.
Shalom AuslanderHe imagined the scene at the gates of heaven to be not unlike that at the finish line of a long and grueling marathon: everyone high-fiving, hugging, collapsing, elated that it’s over, yes, it’s finally over, pouring cups of water over one another’s heads and saying, Holy shit, dude, that was fucking brutal. I am never doing that again.
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