She'd even violated the only sensible rule of dieting she'd ever run across, the sage advice of the Muppets' Miss Piggy, who recommended never eating anything bigger than your head.
Susan DonovanTag: diet rules dieting weight-loss miss-piggy muppets
A punching bag. The guy was pounding on a punching bag. That realization took about a nanosecond to register in her brain before the real important information came to the forefront: LoriSue, God bless her slutty little soul, had been absolutely correct. He was male-stripper material, and he’d been thoughtful enough to strip to a pair of athletic shorts on his very first night in the neighborhood.
Susan DonovanDear God, there couldn't be a single thing more humiliating in this entire world. Unless, of course, Hairy had been out here in his maxi pad. Thomas sighed. Walking around the house with that thing tied around his waist, Hairy had looked like a—well, he'd looked like an ugly dog in a Kotex. Thomas had laughed his ass off at first, but soon discovered the crazy scheme had saved him about three cleanup jobs in one evening alone.
Susan DonovanI think we love who we love and there’s not a damn thing that can be done about it.
Susan DonovanHave you ever met a man who looked so damn delicious that you wanted to sop him up with a hot buttermilk biscuit and inhale him in one gulp?”
“Why, yes, I have,” Doris said.
That was a shocker. “Really? What happened?”
“I married him.
Ah, Milk Duds. The official candy of pissed-off fat women everywhere
Susan DonovanAnd I want cabana boys named Raoul to rub
warm, fragrant oil all over me, from head to toe, all over my throat and chest and my legs and arms. I
want—”
Theo pushed the chair back on the deck and it made a loud scraping sound. He grabbed Lucy’s face
and kissed her hard, then rose up and placed her on her feet, taking her hand.
“Where are we going, Theo?”
“Shh.” He stroked her hair as he led her inside. “The name’s Raoul.
That’s
the kind of dress that belongs on the floor, all wrinkled up, with the zipper broken and the sleeves torn.
That dress isn’t right for you at all. In fact, I think you should take it off right now.
Light mayonnaise is like masturbation—it approximates the real thing but leaves you unfulfilled,
ultimately leading to fantasies about diving face-first into a big-ass jar of the real stuff.
As her lungs pumped and her head cleared, she wondered if all the effort she’d put into blotting out the pain had deadened her ability to feel pleasure, too. What a shame. What a loss.
Susan DonovanTag: sad-but-true
Pagina 1 di 2.
prossimo ultimo »
Data privacy
Imprint
Contact
Diese Website verwendet Cookies, um Ihnen die bestmögliche Funktionalität bieten zu können.