Bruises heal more quickly than emotional scars do.

The Arbinger Institute


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Seeing an equal person as an inferior object is an act of violence

The Arbinger Institute


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always remember that it is progress, not perfection, you should be looking for.

The Arbinger Institute


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People whose hearts are at war toward others can't consider others' objections and challenges enough to be able to find a way through them.

The Arbinger Institute


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If we have deep problems, it's because we are failing at the deepest part of the solution. And when we fail at this deepest level, we invite our own failure.

The Arbinger Institute


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...no conflict can be solved so long as all parties are convinced they are right. Solution is possible only when at least one party begins to consider how he might be wrong.

The Arbinger Institute


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Most problems in life are not solved merely by correction.

The Arbinger Institute


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In every moment...we choose to see others either as people like ourselves or as objects. They either count like we do or they don't.

The Arbinger Institute


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So if we are going to find lasting solutions to difficult conflicts or external wars we find ourselves in, we first need to find our way out of the internal wars that are poisoning our thoughts, feelings, and attitudes toward others. If we can't put an end to the violence within us, there is no hope for putting an end to the violence without.

The Arbinger Institute


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Because if you are the mess, you can clean it. Improvement doesn't depend on others.

The Arbinger Institute


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