3.5 billion men in the world all share one I love you. That’s why men rarely say it, because there is only one in the world for the whole gender to share and take turns using.

“I’m willing to die for the woman I love. I just want to take 75 years to do it.”

“I serve the people. Am I a politician? No, I’m just a greedy and corrupt waiter.”

“I’m wearing shoes made of sea foam, and I am here to seduce the elderly. If you…”

“I let go of her memory the moment I let go of her hand. She fell over 500 feet …”