A figure 8 doesn’t figure into my plans to live to infinity.

“You haven’t lived until you’ve wiped your ass with a pile of sand. Toilet paper…”

“Her car is being repaired, so I offered to give her a lift to work tomorrow. I …”

“Business idea: People like to eat and drive, so why not make edible cars? Inste…”

“If you supplied me a tissue, I wouldn’t need it because I wouldn’t feel like cr…”