An award winner recommended and commended someone’s work, and that someone later endorsed my work, so it’s like I’m an award winner twice removed. And I think that beats being the runner up to the runner up for a major award.

“I sell Ziploc bags. They’re not empty—they’re full of hope.”

“I got you a birthday present. The box is the exact same size as a coffin.”

“Let love find you. Don’t go looking for it. The best way to attract a mate is t…”

“Is a picture really worth a thousand words? What thousand words? A thousand wor…”