As long as you are wearing a hat made out of shingles, you’ll always have a roof over your head.

“Most people buy the highest quality television sets, only to watch the lowest q…”

“Nobody is either honest or dishonest. Life is a gradient, and a saint might be …”

“What’s with the zombie craze? Zombies are half alive, half dead, right? Sounds …”

“I find it hard to fold clothes. Especially if I’m wearing them.”