At the bar, I asked her what she’d like to drink, hoping she’d reply, “Your semen.

“My penis is like a wet noodle, only not as thick. Or tasty.”

“I can taste one sugar crystal, just like I can feel one Cupid (the metric unit …”

“I’d like to file a missing person’s report—on my clone. It’s nearly 2012. He sh…”

“Your face influences your life, because it effects how people treat you. Someti…”