At the end of the day, people go to sleep. Let’s also put the cliché “At the end of the day” to bed.

“I taught a college course called “Of Course!: Helping the Oblivious Realize the…”

“The car wash sign said, “Free Vacuums.” So I told them I wanted a high-powered …”

“The only time I can throw 80 yards is when my football-shaped alarm clock goes …”

“I feel like my old self. Especially since I feel like I’m developing dementia.”