Can you drop me off at work? Just pull up to the front and pop the trunk and I’ll hop out.

“Come buy from me what you could rent elsewhere. Like a Like button or a wiggly …”

“If I ever meet Michael Phelps, I’m going to tell him that I am that Michael Phe…”

“I used to date an older obese woman named Ten, but everyone just called her "X"…”

“I’ve come a long way in the last year. 365 days, to be exact.”