Does Ziploc make body bags? I’ll bet the corpses would stay fresher for longer if they did.

“I make love with my eyes closed, because I make love in my dreams. If you wante…”

“Trying to define love is like trying to catch a ghost named Brita in a glass of…”

“Instead of a Lemonade Stand, I should open up a “You know what I can’t stand?” …”

“I’m growing my hair out. Out of the country, because it’s cheaper to grow it in…”