Education will only take you so far. To go even further, I’d recommend getting a piggyback ride from a midget half your body weight.

“I have hair on my chest. And it’s purring.”

“I don’t know when I’m going to stop when I start—or start when I stop. That’s w…”

“Don’t be jealous if I spend 50% of my time with you, and 50% of my time with ot…”

“A brick could be used to remind you. I would remind you of what you need to be …”