Growing up, I went through an awkward stage. It lasted from birth to last Tuesday.

“Bricks could be used to fill my empty trophy cabinet. But first I’ve got to win…”

“A blanket could be used to sell ice cream to streakers. Well, it could, if thos…”

“A brick could be used as man’s best friend, if you covered it in fur and taught…”

“Is it any wonder that war is senseless? It’s started by politicians. As a class…”