He was still a douchecanoe. The douchecanoe who was going to paddle me to safety.

“I couldn’t even masturbate without fearing I’d cry out his name and scare the d…”

“I didn’t want to be Red Fox’s saviour, but I wanted to be hers.”

“Come now,” Javier said. “Sharing a bed with me isn’t that bad. You’ve been doin…”

“Why are you so embarrassed?” he asked playfully. “So you passed out during an a…”