Horses aren’t sad. They just naturally have long faces.

“My girlfriend bought me a collared shirt for my birthday, mainly so I don’t get…”

“There’s nothing nine-tenths about me as a person. I’m a 100% kind of guy, at le…”

“When I smell small, my nose gets clogged up. Think what would happen if I whiff…”

“This is America. Every vote counts. Sometimes twice, if it helps me get elected.”