I am honest and enthusiastic, except when I’m lying down.

“I stepped on a banana spider today. I didn't crush it, but I did slip and fall.…”

“Last night I placed a handwritten note on the front door of my neighbor’s house…”

“I didn’t write this piece to attract a potential mate, as the title might lead …”

“He was a man I came to respect. Not because he wore Ziploc bags for socks (he h…”