I can read people like an open book, especially if their named Braille, and I’m in a touchy-feely mood.

“His last name was Worthless. Or was that just the perfect word to describe him?…”

“I’m 6’3”, but you would think I was Napoleon’s height because I’m slouched over…”

“Her last name is Bunch, but her first name isn’t Brady. And there was a bunch o…”

“I told her I'd rather talk about her, instead of listening to her drone on abou…”