I can’t afford to waste either my money or my time—but that doesn’t stop me from trying.

“Dear Mr. Peacock,
I miss your plumage, and I’m flummoxed by your plummeting des…”

“Words are all we’ve got. Besides, of course, actions. But you can’t print out a…”

“If I could adorn myself with a question, I’d wear a where. It would never go ou…”

“I’d staple my breath to your chest, if I thought it’d help you breathe easier. …”