I could never be a chef, because I could ‘t bare the thought of my art always turning to shit.

“I am not a professionally trained professional. I am an amateur professional!”

“You wouldn’t try to mow your lawn with an electric razor, like it was a green b…”

“If my name were Isaac Newton, would I be a famous no name? I’d have worldwide a…”

“L and V, both angular. O and E, both vowels. Coupled together, like a couple of…”