I don’t demand much. All I expect is for you to love me so much you kill yourself just to get my attention.

“The worst book I’ve ever read is “Ulysses,” by Joyce, because like my undergrad…”

“My grandma came over yesterday, and I had just jumped out of the shower, so I a…”

“A brick could be tied to a cape, and then exalted as a superhero. Is that any m…”

“To be surrounded by sixty people who make your life miserable is to be at a fam…”