I found panties in the chimney, and they’re not mine. They must belong to a fire crotch.

“My love is as loud as it can be while still being silent. Would you describe ou…”

“I think trees should bloom earlier in the spring. They act like they are on a s…”

“Amputate your leg, and attach it to the underside of your wobbly, three-legged …”

“Lead is to lead as follow is to follow. And lead is to lead as a type of metal …”