I got offended when she laughed, because she was showing pleasure, but she was also showing displeasure—in all the previous moments where she hadn’t laughed.

“I’ll bet if I write a sentence and mention the word “edit,” people will slow do…”

“There’s a penis in my penne pasta. It’s my penis, but that doesn’t mean it belo…”

“A brick could be used to tell the time. If you can see it it’s daytime, and if …”

“A wink and a glance walk into a bar. I know because I saw it out of the corner …”