I had a hot date last night. Things were going well so I took her back to her house, dropped her off, and went home to masturbate.

“Some wise guys came by my business establishment and tried to offer me neighbor…”

“The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my bedroom win…”

“It may be 9:01 am, and I may have a 9-5 business, but if you are a politician, …”

“One Jarod’s a lover, and one Jarod’s a fighter. Which Jarod am I? The middle on…”