I make ridiculous like I make damn sure nobody sees me while I’m making it.

“I find it more polite when I yawn without opening my mouth. I also talk this wa…”

“A brick could be used to represent my hero. My hero obviously doesn’t look like…”

“I took my pants off slowly, thinking if I did it too fast I’d possibly rip a ho…”

“My watch has two hands. So do I. I’d better watch my watch to see if it also ma…”