I need your help. You can help me by not helping me.

“Selling flesh-tearing torture devices for more than $55,555 dollars, now that’s…”

“I got stiffed on a tip. It was an erection.”

“Three people are interviewing for a job. The first thinks his odds are 33.3 per…”

“At the end of the day, people go to sleep. Let’s also put the cliché “At the en…”