I observe President’s Day. I observe it with my binoculars.

“A part-time worker is fully employed, half the time. In other words, they are p…”

“In high school I got voted most likely to get voted for something. Even though …”

“Dipping my sticky glove into the bowl, I grabbed a handful of fingers. That’s f…”

“Everybody thinks they’re a prophet. They must, or nobody would get married. Or …”