I once saw a politician walking a dog, and I thought, “How absurd—an animal walking an animal.” Then I thought, “If given the choice, I’d rather vote for the dog.

“I collect hair. I keep most of it on my floor, but my most valuable patches I d…”

“I’ve just awarded myself a trophy for bicycling. It’s big and it only has one w…”

“I’d collaborate with my clones, because I’m a team player who wants all the cre…”

“Blankets could be used to stop exponential population growth. If we kept the pe…”