I retired at the age of 25, and it wasn’t until a few days later that I realized that in order to retire you need a stash of cash, and if I wanted to live to the age of 26, I’d better reenter the workforce. Or, rather, enter it for the first time.

“In the morning I brush my teeth with hope, and at night before bed I brush them…”

“I wish success could be ordered like delivery pizza, because I’d order take out.”

“Starbucks has odd drink sizes. I say man’s hands were meant to be cupped, so po…”

“I’m not gentlemanly. When I’m gentle, I’m not manly, and when I’m manly, I’m no…”