I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

“Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim ups…”

“I never hold a grudge. As soon as I get even with the son-of-a bitch, I forget …”

“Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill?Oh, thank goodness... I tho…”

“I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.”