I talked so much about my product that I sold myself. I bought the very thing I was selling, and I think I overpaid.

“I don’t want a home, but I do want to buy a lot that I like a lot.”

“Sometimes I wear sunglasses while I urinate, and pretend that my pee is a solar…”

“Sometimes I pretend I'm from the 19th century. Then I drive around and say, Wow…”

“My high school principal, Mr. Heisenberg, was the uncertain principal.”