I used a bag of potato chips as a sock once. Roll Tide!

“Silence is golden, and gold is up these days, so silence is a solid investment.”

“My bed’s as big as a medium-sized apartment in New York City. And my erection i…”

“Hemingway suggested you write the truest sentence you know. I say write the fal…”

“She didn’t just disappear from my life—she had the audacity to die on me. And u…”