I want to blanket the city of Hamburg with a slice of melted cheese.

“I fell in love with a beautiful girl, got her pregnant, and then I got married.…”

“It wouldn’t necessarily be tongue in cheek if a woman told me I kiss like a too…”

“I told her “Have a good weekend.” Then I thought, “Idiot. It’s Sunday night.”

“The code of the coward is to run away. I know, because I wrote the manual.”