I want to win an award that doesn’t exist yet. Well, I want my clone to win it, and that’s almost the same thing—and he also doesn’t exist yet, so it’s perfect.

“In a recent Gallup poll conducted in France while riding a horse, two out of th…”

“Women are like convertibles: They should be topless. Also, they should stay in …”

“My shadow’s so substantial that it has its own shadow. It isn’t as tall, but th…”

“A blanket could be used to confuse and disorient. Think of it not as a bed ador…”