I wear a helmet when I write, because if you’re doing it right, writing is dangerous.

“I’m older now, which I can’t help, but I’m also fatter, thanks to all the extra…”

“His last name was Worthless. Or was that just the perfect word to describe him?…”

“Even if I worked in the corruption capital of the world, Washington DC, I would…”

“Don’t chop off your fingers because you have an itch. That’d be dumb. Instead, …”