I’d never name my kid Mark, for fear he’d be a target—a mark.

“Starbucks has odd drink sizes. I say man’s hands were meant to be cupped, so po…”

“My father went AWOL the day I got dishonorably discharged from his penis.
”

“I can envision your success all day long, but until you imagine its reality, it…”

“Some people sleep their lives away. But I also want to sleep death away. If I s…”