I’d punch a guy that likes a girl 16 years younger. Especially if that guy was 18 years old.

“A blanket could be used to sell two-legged tables to one-legged men. This very …”

“I rode my horse to the saloon, but it was out of business. The cowboy I spoke w…”

“When I sing, it sounds like I’m gargling spaghetti. Is it any wonder that women…”

“When my coffee is gone, so is my motivation.”