If I were the color blue, and you were the color orange, I wouldn't want you around all the time, because who wants to be constantly complimented?

“A brick could be used to wipe your ass with. You know, if you already live some…”

“I made 100 dollars, or a Ben Franklin, today. And out of that I probably spent …”

“I want to create a 3-4 deal—buy three for the price of four. Offer valid for an…”

“I love how babies look like old people. I saw a baby the other day that looked …”