If one unlabeled bottle holds nonfat milk, what does the second unlabeled bottle contain? If you answered “Whole milk” then you’re obviously not ready to receive a jug of my love. So I’ll just pour it in someone else’s coffee.


“I peed on the floor to get hired. Now I’m the janitor. 
”

“I really am who I seem to be, and I’m coming apart at the seams.”

“I want a 100% kind of relationship, and I’m willing to give it 50%.”

“In a lot of ways I am like a duck. I love the water; I have large, web-like fee…”