If you ask me to describe what I look like, I’ll simply say, “I look like my clone.

“I just took a shit that smelled like a dentist’s office. Open your mouth.”

“I like food that speaks to me. Food like French toast, English muffins, and Dev…”

“I love nature. It beats having to flush.”

“Messages written across the chest of women’s t-shirts are great, because I can …”