If you could buy time, I would sell it. Yesterday would be expensive, and tomorrow would be cheap.

“A brick could be used as a steak knife, and a fly swatter could be used as a me…”

“A blanket could be used to cover up my modesty. And used to cover up my nakedne…”

“A window—it’s more entertaining than TV. Just ask a cat looking out, or a man l…”

“Birthdays: without them we'd be immortal. But just because you're not immortal,…”